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Sometimes I really hate him. 1/4/2004
I have a great boyfriend, dont get me wrong he treats me well
and is a wonderful person. It just seems that at times he
really annoys me, just little things, and sometimes big
things. At first I thought, okay maybe I am just about to
start my period so I am letting him get to me or whatever.
Well, I think I am wrong about that. I just hate him sometimes.
Last week, we were hanging out, just ...
0 Comentarios, 28 Vistas,
34 Votos
,3.42 Puntuación
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Your permission slip 14/3/2004
APPLICATION TO GO OUT AND RETURN LATE
<br>
Name of Boyfriend/Fiancé/Husband:
<br>
I request permission for a leave of absence from the highest
authority in my life for the following period:
<br>
Date: Time of departure: Time of return:
<br>
Should permission be granted, I do solemnly swear to only
visit the locations stated ...
0 Comentarios, 15 Vistas,
69 Votos
,6.32 Puntuación
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New rating system 8/3/2004
Jack and Bill were knocking back beers and shooting the
shit at a bar when a hot chick walked in.
"I'd give her a Seven, : Jack said.
Bill shook his head and said, "One."
Another hot babe walked in.
"Whoa, " Jack drooled, "that one gets
a nine!"
Bill shrugged, "Maybe a two."
"Wait a minute, " Jack protested. "These
two girls were the best ones I've seen in a long time,
and all ...
0 Comentarios, 102 Vistas,
78 Votos
,7.43 Puntuación
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wife hubby... 7/3/2004
husband: i think u enjoy a lot while doing sex...
wife: yep i do enjoy a lot ... it would have been better if
u were there to see my enjoyemnt....
0 Comentarios, 23 Vistas,
89 Votos
,5.48 Puntuación
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How to get a man's attention 21/2/2004
This has got to be one of the best singles ads ever printed.
It appeared in the Atlanta Journal. Companion Wanted:
SINGLE BLACK FEMALE seeks companionship, ethnicity unimportant.
I am a very good looking girl who LOVES to play. I love long
walks in the woods, riding in your pick-up truck, hunting,
camping, fishing trips, and cozy winter nights lying by
the fire. Candlelight dinners will ...
0 Comentarios, 61 Vistas,
184 Votos
,9.26 Puntuación
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A friendly encounter 20/2/2004
I had this really good friend named Dave who also had a friend
named Rusty. Well, Rusty had this really knockout girlfriend
named
Candy. Dave is a real bullshitter and I didn't believe
half of the
wild stories he told, so I just ignored his comments about
how wild
Candy got when she got drunk. He told me how Rusty was the
type of
guy that only wanted it about once or twice a week and ...
0 Comentarios, 39 Vistas,
67 Votos
,2.84 Puntuación
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REMEMBER TO TAKE IT OFF!!! 17/2/2004
My friend & I met these two guys from out of town, they
were only here for a short time building
a house.
We went to dinner, then to a local bar for drinks and dancing.
There wasn't a whole lot of dancing
going on, but there was groping under the table.
We drove back to their motel and my friend, with her date,
went upstairs. I stayed in the car
with my date for a while talking ...
1 Comentarios, 487 Vistas,
119 Votos
,7.09 Puntuación
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His and her road trips 17/2/2004
His & Hers Road Trips
HERS
1. Pulls off at wrong exit.
2. Opens window.
3. Asks directions of a knowledgeable police officer.
4. Arrives at destination presently.
<br>
HIS
1. Pulls off at wrong exit absolutely positive it's
the correct one.
2. Drives five miles into wilderness, still thinks he's
right.
3. Drives an extra five miles just in case.
4. Finally rolls ...
1 Comentarios, 170 Vistas,
43 Votos
,5.73 Puntuación
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oops my ass! 10/2/2004
so there I was with my girl in college. Lights out dormroom
all to ourselves. How did I know it was all to myself? my roommate
and I had a code if the sock was in the door, DO NOT ENTER. So
my girl and I were happily going at in and all of a sudden the
door pops open and this hot girl michele was standing there
staring. Of course my ass was up in the air from pounding
away and she just ...
0 Comentarios, 68 Vistas,
56 Votos
,3.40 Puntuación
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a funny "nightmare" 27/1/2004
This happened a few years back, but I still laugh thinking
about it. One night, after several drinks, my husband and
I were having sex. Well, I must have been really, really
loud because the next thing we knew was that our
was at our door and about to open it. My husband jumped out
of the bed, which was funny in itself because it was dark
and he tripped over the cover, grabbed something to ...
0 Comentarios, 68 Vistas,
37 Votos
,6.45 Puntuación
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RE: just sitting in the truck 12/1/2004
My wife left out a bunch of stuff! this is what happened.
we had been up for a day or two and it was in the middle of the
night and it was extremly hot so i was driving down the road
with just my shirt off. well we pulled into a truck stop i
put my shirt on not realizing i still had my seatbelt still
on. well i asked her to pick up some goodys from the store
i was going to go in to the ...
0 Comentarios, 77 Vistas,
69 Votos
,2.94 Puntuación
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Deep, hard question... 6/1/2004
I know I haven't known you very long and I shouldn't
be asking you for this so soon, but I really need it badly.
I haven't had it for a while and I can already feel it
going in good and hard and coming out nice and soft. If you
would do this for me no one would ever know. I am sure you can
satisfy my needs and I'd be very grateful if you would.
I am very desperate and I need your help. You ...
0 Comentarios, 109 Vistas,
88 Votos
,7.89 Puntuación
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Whiskey Dick 31/12/2003
Guys: it's bad enough you're so fucking drunk
that you'll probably puke on yourself & you smell
like a vodka tonic, but what the fuck makes you think we want
to waste our time waiting to see if you can get your "flexi-dick"
in the hole?!!
0 Comentarios, 24 Vistas,
76 Votos
,7.36 Puntuación
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ever watch your guy bake a cake? 31/12/2003
I've been dating this guy for over a year... I have never
seen anyone bake a cake quite the way he did... I began to
smell the cake and since I have been cooking for some 30 or
more years LOL I can tell by the smell when something iz done
cooking... I told him to check the cake to make sure it waz
done. (I new it waz) he opened the door to the oven, and closed
it... saying the cake waz not ...
0 Comentarios, 18 Vistas,
54 Votos
,8.94 Puntuación
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we were setting in the truck 31/12/2003
my husband was setting in his truck so tired that he could
not stand up.we stoped at a truck stop.gene told me to go
get something up.he said he had to pee so when he went to get
out of the truck he still had his seatbelt on well he about
had a fit becoused he could not get out.i told him to unastened
his seatbelt then he could get out (hell it worked)now i
think he will think before he ...
0 Comentarios, 46 Vistas,
34 Votos
,0.72 Puntuación
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When your sex partner packs a wallop make sure that you can handle it before you actually see it. 26/12/2003
My second boyfriend and myself finally decided to get busy.
We were going to go the whole nine yards. Foreplay was excellent,
I came four times. My boyfriend was very spontaneous, He
licked and sucked every inch of my body. I went crazy everytime
his tongue and fingers touched my pussy. He was talented.
My nipples enjoyed his mouth.
<br>
Of course, we came to the part where I had ...
0 Comentarios, 54 Vistas,
83 Votos
,4.39 Puntuación
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3 types of sex in marriage 17/11/2003
When you are married, you have 3 types of sex.
<br>
Frist comes Kitchen Sex - you have sex everywhere. In the
kitchen, living room, anywhere BUT the bedroom.
<br>
Second, you have Bedroom Sex, since isn't bee a few
years and you might have , and the bedroom is the
only place you can have sex.
<br>
A few years after that, you start to have Hallway Sex. You ...
0 Comentarios, 25 Vistas,
102 Votos
,7.63 Puntuación
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First Three Weeks 10/11/2003
Why is it that the first two or three weeks of a fling are the
best? Her tits are firmer, pussy tastes better, and there's
more energy in the sex? Do I just get bored or do other people
have that same problem?
0 Comentarios, 14 Vistas,
32 Votos
,4.46 Puntuación
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Confucious Says... 9/11/2003
A flirtatious man at a local gas station shared the following
with me:
Do you know what Confucious says? Confucious says that
does not exist.
Myself being witty responded, and why is that, because
you can't the willing?
No he stated, because women run faster with dress that is
up than men with pants that are down.
0 Comentarios, 60 Vistas,
37 Votos
,6.11 Puntuación
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Humour 26/10/2003
A sense of humour comes in very handy to help you through
those rough patches.
0 Comentarios, 34 Vistas,
88 Votos
,6.38 Puntuación
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Uner Pressure 24/10/2003
About 5 years ago on a hot September night, my girlfriend
at the time and I went out to the Claim Jumper for dinner.
If you have ever eaten there, you know they serve the largest
portions than just about anywhere. We had a couple of cocktails
before dinner and drank a bottle of wine while I stuffed
myself until I could hardly breathe.
When we got back home, we sat in the Jacuzzi and had a ...
0 Comentarios, 31 Vistas,
100 Votos
,7.44 Puntuación
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Grandparents get it on! 23/10/2003
Grandma & Grandpa were sittin' & a rockin'on
the front porch while I was fixin' the window on the
side of the house, they didn't know I overheard them
talkin' dirty to each other, hell they're 90 yrs.
old!
Gramma said to gramps " Hey! FUCK YOU granpa"
and she just kept rockin'.
a little while later gramps says "Well ya know what,
FUCK YOU TOO Gramma" and they just kept rockin'.
After ...
0 Comentarios, 93 Vistas,
125 Votos
,8.63 Puntuación
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You're both Too selfish Pricks 19/10/2003
OK. You are in the best relationship of your life. You met
him/her in the library, class, club or where ever the hell
is you met. You say neither of you were looking but you hit
it off great. You called each other up a few times. Had lunch,
dinner, went bowling, and caught a few flicks together.
Your a nice girl/guy and the perrson you are dating is really
digging you.
The bad part about ...
0 Comentarios, 34 Vistas,
58 Votos
,3.57 Puntuación
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my most embarrassing sexual moment 1/10/2003
When I was engaged to my exwife I was a member of a men's
pool league that played other local bars. Well we played
this on place called the Dutch Cellar and I shot the best
match I ever shot in my life. Well all my buddies started
buying me beer and shots. I drank about 13 beers and 4 shots
in two hours.
<br>
Well I shouldn't have DROVE home but I did. I thought
she would be in ...
0 Comentarios, 108 Vistas,
287 Votos
,7.26 Puntuación
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Masturbation 11/8/2003
I am 6'3" 190lbs and fit. I had come out of the shower
into the bedroom, and was drying off as useual, started
rubbing my body down with cocobutter also as useual, but
when I started rubbing cocobutter on my penis it felt so
good that I could'nt stop. I contenued to rub my cock
until it grew to it's full 7 1/2 inches by then I could
feel the blood serging through my body as my cock began to ...
0 Comentarios, 76 Vistas,
265 Votos
,5.73 Puntuación
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A Geography Lesson 10/7/2003
THE GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN
Between 18 and 22
a woman is like Africa...
half discovered, half wild,
naturally beautiful with
fertile deltas.
<br>
Between 23 and 30
a woman is like America.....
well developed and open to trade,
especially for high financed investors.
<br>
Between 31 and 45
a woman is like India...
very hot, relaxed and
convinced ...
0 Comentarios, 37 Vistas,
282 Votos
,8.25 Puntuación
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If love never comes 15/6/2003
My friend if LOVE never comes life will never have or hold
meaning !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If love never comes will life have meaning ?
NO i say
Will liveing in this dat and time be worh liveing at all ?
No it will be a waist of space and time !
Will the things that all people see as necarry mean a thing
to me ?
NO solimen in his wisdom seen that with out ...
0 Comentarios, 16 Vistas,
106 Votos
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Poor thing... 29/5/2003
<br>
I once dated a woman who on occasion was very horny and impatient.
She wanted me to come over right away. But as I was still doing
office work, still needed to take a shower, and stop by the
grocery store, I told her that I wasn't sure that I'd
be able to make it that evening. Well, this woman was quite
persistent which sometimes got on my nerves. Such was the
case on ...
0 Comentarios, 52 Vistas,
157 Votos
,5.65 Puntuación
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